Driving for the Family...

The hardest thing about watching your child fight sickness, especially something called cancer, is witnessing your child lose their innocence. I can’t explain the whole situation because I don’t completely understand it my self. This little blessing you create is your angel. If you have no children it might be hard to understand, but if you’re lucky enough to have the experience of raising children then you know what I mean.

My child wanted to cuddle and snuggle nine months ago. Sickness hit then things changed. There are so many other things going on besides being daddy’s little girl now. That is the worst for me. I want to love but it’s an inconvenience for her at times. Sickness rules the house and everything else is secondary.

Kaylee left for the emergency room around 9:30 tonight for blood. She is running low and needs it badly so we decided to take her tonight instead of waiting until tomorrow. We are so close to the final phase, we want to be safe and we want Kaylee to feel as healthy as possible. I stayed home with Christian.

I went in to check on the little guy and he was sleeping. This is unusual for him. We normally have to tell him to go to sleep. He was sleeping when I went in around 10:30. I suspect he wanted to end the day because of Kaylee and the fact his big sister had to pack up and go to the hospital so late. As I went to turn the TV off I looked at the top of his head. The only thing exposed beneath the covers. I felt for him. He is part of a family that has to make concessions for the sickness. I love him for taking it and never complaining.

I took Christian to baseball tonight. I let the dog go as well. As I watched him I could not help but think how incredibly talented he is. He is so good at baseball. So good that he gets noticed by everyone that passes by any field he is on. His talent is not being inflated by a proud father but being relayed from a spectator who happens to be his proud father.

Being good at something doesn’t guarantee you’ll be noticed. Christian is noticed and I hope he continues to get the notoriety from his hard work & talent. I think being good at something is important. I was okay at wrestling. But sports never fully engaged me. They still don’t. I had a ticket for tomorrow's basketball tournament but I decided I have more important things to get done.

I like what I do for a living. Today I was finishing up where my construction guy fell short and I felt something. I was watching people working in the Power & Light District this morning and I couldn’t help but feel the feeling of working for someone else. I don’t have much experience working for others but I do have certain memories. My memories usually involve a pit in my stomach. I hated being somewhere because someone told me to be there. Weird but true. I never really found that place with anyone else’s business. I would arrive do what was expected but I never truly fit in. That’s okay. I respect everyone that can earn a living whether it be for their selves or for the other guy.

I had to leave at 6:00am this morning to get to the jobsite. As I was driving I felt a great feeling. It wasn’t because I was going to my awesome job, but for all the people driving to theirs. I couldn’t help but think that the majority of those driving were doing so to feed their families. They were up early to make things happen for those loved ones probably still at home sleeping. Maybe it was me that I was watching in those other cars!