Surreal...

I had to go to Children's Mercy Hospital today for a prescription. I went to the fourth floor, 4-H. There I waited for the doctor to arrive so she could give me my script. While I'm there I take in the surroundings. There are bald children in slippers walking the hall. There are nurses and doctors walking from room to room. Then there's a young girl in the play room, she is balding. She sports a cap, but I can see the thin hair. Her mother is sitting at a table and it looks like they're doing crafts. I haven't seen this child before, and with the thinning hair I suspect she is a new patient.

This view and this scene is what you would see in a Hollywood movie. It is a scene I'd prefer to be excluded from. But I can't so I take it in as spectator today. We don't check in til tomorrow. So my visit to 4-H is tense free and worry free. I'm at ease and more observant then usual.

I look and can't believe that I'm here and part of this. I had a talk with the doctor and head nurse. I told them about my observations. We all agreed that you have to find the good in your situation. I'm sure there's those who get bitter and mean. Those who collapse. Although I write like I'm about to collapse, I'm alright. I've been hit with an over-whelming sense of love for my family. I truly care for people more then I did five months ago. I know that we all fight battles on some level but I'm looking at my battle as personal growth. I 'm more aware of the word and the definition of "today".

We have to enjoy today. I have to be thankful and grateful for each day. I never want to end the day with regrets. If I have to go to CMH then I want to feel like I'm blessed to see so many beautiful children fighting their battle. I'm part of the life and healing that takes place on the 4th floor. I can look at it as a bad thing or an enriching thing. I'm going to thank God for the opportunity to see life from an angle that most won't. You can have lemons or you can have lemonade. I'm thirsty, so I'll have a nice cold glass of lemonade.