I am trying to sleep but can't. It's hard having my family split, even for a few days. We have our roles and Tammie's is mom. She makes my daughter feel secure at night, I make them feel secure in general. I think I do. My writings might have them questioning everything but I don't think so.
I thank God for giving me a family. To have a team of your own is priceless. We are one, if one of us is hurting or happy then we all are. Harmony. To fight this battle without a mate or family would be a challenge. I can't question why this happens to certain families but I sometimes question the lesson. Maybe there isn't one, but I think there is.
What really matters has shifted. I was so consumed with things outside of my family before this sickness that I think about wasted time. Everything has a priority list, but I might of had certain things wrong on my list. Business is all I was focused on for years. But to my defense I was dedicated strictly to my family when we lived in California. I spent all my time focusing on the kids.
When I was growing up, I had so much love for my mom. She raised us single handily. I hope my family loves me just a fraction of the love I had for my mom. I'm sure it's the same amount but they aren't the most vocal teammates. Can I get some love? Just playing.
I saw a friend yesterday on the 4th floor of CMH. It was a girl I worked with many years ago. She was in nursing school back then so I assumed she may have been working. I was startled or heartbroken when she told me her son had leukemia. When you see someone on the 4th floor you want to hope they are only visiting.
I have to admit that I also felt a sense of comfort. I meet people that are battling disease but its rare to actually know someone. Like I said it was years ago and I'm surprised she remembered me but I felt a bond immediately. So please understand that I wouldn't wish this on anyone but I did feel relief knowing I have a friend that can relate. Who knows when I might have to talk or when one of our spouses or kids might need each other.
So if you see me in the Cancer Unit please put on some scrubs and say hello. If it's for other reasons please know you can always talk to me and if I can help, I will. I just wanted to share a quick story and describe my incomplete night.
I thank God for giving me a family. To have a team of your own is priceless. We are one, if one of us is hurting or happy then we all are. Harmony. To fight this battle without a mate or family would be a challenge. I can't question why this happens to certain families but I sometimes question the lesson. Maybe there isn't one, but I think there is.
What really matters has shifted. I was so consumed with things outside of my family before this sickness that I think about wasted time. Everything has a priority list, but I might of had certain things wrong on my list. Business is all I was focused on for years. But to my defense I was dedicated strictly to my family when we lived in California. I spent all my time focusing on the kids.
When I was growing up, I had so much love for my mom. She raised us single handily. I hope my family loves me just a fraction of the love I had for my mom. I'm sure it's the same amount but they aren't the most vocal teammates. Can I get some love? Just playing.
I saw a friend yesterday on the 4th floor of CMH. It was a girl I worked with many years ago. She was in nursing school back then so I assumed she may have been working. I was startled or heartbroken when she told me her son had leukemia. When you see someone on the 4th floor you want to hope they are only visiting.
I have to admit that I also felt a sense of comfort. I meet people that are battling disease but its rare to actually know someone. Like I said it was years ago and I'm surprised she remembered me but I felt a bond immediately. So please understand that I wouldn't wish this on anyone but I did feel relief knowing I have a friend that can relate. Who knows when I might have to talk or when one of our spouses or kids might need each other.
So if you see me in the Cancer Unit please put on some scrubs and say hello. If it's for other reasons please know you can always talk to me and if I can help, I will. I just wanted to share a quick story and describe my incomplete night.
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