Friday, May 9, 2008

Stability in the mood...

Kaylee can't sleep because she has pain going on with her arm. We think it is those steroids again but who knows. Yesterday morning was extremely difficult because Tammie was going to the store and asked if I would lay in bed with Kay so she wasn't alone. I went in and she had tears rolling down her face. It sucks not being able to do for someone you love. It also sucks having to be emotionally tough towards your kid. I hate that there's pain, I hate that my child is in her room crying when she should be at school having fun. This young girl is fighting things no one should, and dealing with emotional things way beyond her years. Watching as a father, but more importantly her father, is beyond words.

I can watch a program about kids in Africa and get emotional. I will easily shed a tear and get choked up. To have your own kid, one that is suffering look at you for relief is tough. I can only sit with her and rub her back or leg to give comfort. I feel so guilty that I can't grab her and get emotional but I can't because we have to be strong to get through this. Even though I can't fix this, I have to look strong for stability. Stability is an important thing during times like these!

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