Good morning. It is 6:00 AM and I am doing school duty with Christian. I wake him, he showers, and off to school he goes. Simple. But he never wakes up when I get him up. Five more minutes, ten more minutes. Well we're fine this morning because I'm wide awake. I went to sleep early and I feel good. So there is no mistakes I'm making this morning. Sometimes I fall a sleep, Tammie calls and I'm in trouble because we have 5 minutes before the bus arrives. But not this morning.
I wanted to stay at the hospital last night but Kaylee said "NO". She feels more comfortable when Tammie is with her. I have my niche. I'm the fun one. Concerts and movies. For a comfortable house or for chemo call Tammie. I'm so lucky to have the other part of a team that can deliver comfort. Kaylee needs to be comfortable.
I can't begin to tell you how draining the hospital is. It's not just draining to me but for Kaylee as well. Yesterday her spirit drifted quickly. Her eyes and demeanor shifted immediately. She went from the happy out of the hospital young lady to the "we're here again kid" Such a painful thing to watch that transition. We have had such a good month without the poison.
The eyes are a gauge. I can look at Kaylee and tell how much this ordeal is weighing on her. She cried yesterday because no one comes to visit. She is fifteen and has to endure this alone. No friends to really count on. That doesn't mean she doesn't have friends. It just means she has to do this by herself because it is an internal battle. We won't leave her side, but I can't take the load. It is Kaylee and all we can do is make it as easy as possible. They say life goes on, and it does.
Again I'm very emotional when it comes to people. Well it is very hard now because it's my kid and I see the dynamics and the events unfolding daily & weekly. Kaylee is sick and she is fighting this with her family. Friends text and call but they are standing clear for us. They don't want to get in the way as we fight. But it is hard because Kaylee is fifteen and wants to live like a fifteen year old. We'll know shortly what our days will be like. Hopefully Kaylee will back into a normal schedule, and we can get that monkey off our back. Lets get this girl back to her friends and her routine.
I wanted to stay at the hospital last night but Kaylee said "NO". She feels more comfortable when Tammie is with her. I have my niche. I'm the fun one. Concerts and movies. For a comfortable house or for chemo call Tammie. I'm so lucky to have the other part of a team that can deliver comfort. Kaylee needs to be comfortable.
I can't begin to tell you how draining the hospital is. It's not just draining to me but for Kaylee as well. Yesterday her spirit drifted quickly. Her eyes and demeanor shifted immediately. She went from the happy out of the hospital young lady to the "we're here again kid" Such a painful thing to watch that transition. We have had such a good month without the poison.
The eyes are a gauge. I can look at Kaylee and tell how much this ordeal is weighing on her. She cried yesterday because no one comes to visit. She is fifteen and has to endure this alone. No friends to really count on. That doesn't mean she doesn't have friends. It just means she has to do this by herself because it is an internal battle. We won't leave her side, but I can't take the load. It is Kaylee and all we can do is make it as easy as possible. They say life goes on, and it does.
Again I'm very emotional when it comes to people. Well it is very hard now because it's my kid and I see the dynamics and the events unfolding daily & weekly. Kaylee is sick and she is fighting this with her family. Friends text and call but they are standing clear for us. They don't want to get in the way as we fight. But it is hard because Kaylee is fifteen and wants to live like a fifteen year old. We'll know shortly what our days will be like. Hopefully Kaylee will back into a normal schedule, and we can get that monkey off our back. Lets get this girl back to her friends and her routine.
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