Pain

July 22, 2007 - You gave us the name. Leukemia. We didn't want it but we took it. The sickness. We accepted it. The exhaustion we dealt with it. We'll work around the inconvenience.

But the Pain? Come on! What in the world could justify the pain? Give us any thing and we'll take it like a punch in the face. But the pain. It kills. I'd take anything but could you please leave out the pain. The bones aching, the fingers and toes curled from the hurt.

The helplessness of not being able to comfort your baby is horrindous. To have your little one grabb your hand for comfort, only to realize that you can't fix it tears you apart. When they release that hand is when you know that they know that this fight is truly internal.

I have never been around someone that is battling such pain & sickness. The fight is enough to make you pray, plead, and shout. I think this eventually will become a gift. A gift that test ones courage, toughness, and spirit. A test that will make my baby girl smell things differently. Taste in a new way. Live life in a new perspective. I only wish we could leave the pain out.