I found some very crude renderings of a series of short essays, Self-Help/How To short books – that I did 6 nearly 7 years ago; I called them “Some Cheese Please” Vol. 1- Vol. 13. They were inspired by my daughter Kaylee needing some cheese for her Quesadilla. I was so grief stricken, deathly ill, over certain situations that I couldn't put cheese in the refrigerator (I did the grocery shopping for nearly 25+ years) because I was sick in my head and my heart had a hole in it. I wasn’t able to hop in the car and fetch the cheese. I feel that nothing we do is in vain. Time spent hurting usually spins off into growth. Unfamiliar territory normally leads to knowledge of new things, and bad stuff almost always turns into wisdom. The time I spent writing, wasting or passing the time, may turn out to be time well spent. I say that because I’ve been researching how certain authors make a living off Kindle eBooks on Amazon. It looks like those little essays I wrote are in high demand, the 20-40 pg. Kindle eBooks. I started looking into the Amazon and the online eBook industry. I know it takes individuals years to write just one book which most never make it into anyone else's hands beside family and friends.
Along with the Some Cheese Please How-to collections I opened up a short story I wrote about my Aunt Connie. I recently posted it on my social sites. I actually didn’t feel I had the right without asking. That was crazy, my memories of my Aunt are beautiful and I decided to share them. That writing, and one that I did on my Uncle had thousands of views but no comments or feedback. It was weird.
I finally figured it out. The people, the pages I posted to took the posting off their page after a matter of hours. Not all but two main pages. I guess I should have asked permission but it’s OK. I know when people are hurt it can evoke emotions that they or anyone else isn't used to. I completely understand and they know I didn't have but good intentions. I also hope my family will understand that I couldn’t make it to my Uncle’s funeral out of personal reasons. I can’t see other people hurting it saddens me and I get emotional. I wish that I fully understood and could explain but - I can’t. I’ve waved off funerals for the time being. I love them in my heart and I’m there in thought but actually attending - I can’t. To everyone out there, if you pass I'm not going but know I'm there in spirit.
I have been trying to see things with reason. I've been trying apologize to everyone that I owe one to and who I feel deserves one and forgive when I can. I’ve been a mad person lately and that's not me. I’ve changed from younger years. Back then I could forgive rather quickly because I’d get you really quickly. There was something about getting my hands on someone and the closure process. But today I’m too old and I'm learning to stay away from trouble even if closure is a long process. Any sort of relationship that has red flags I take as a potential toxic bomb, and there’s been enough of toxicity in my life the last several years. I'll let those others have at it because I'm fine and quite alright by me, with me, and for me.
I have so many things that are completed now. I am getting ready to do a couple projects, both of which are good for the community. One is non-profit the other is for-profit but both have components that are good for the community. One of the programs is being called, "The Mile Wide Smile Initiative" the other "ACFP". That isn't saying too much and I apologize but I'm hesitant so not to put any juju on them before they launch. I hope all is well and that you’re loving the one your with and there’s plenty of happiness in your life. Until I see you next time, take care and much loves to you!
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